MADEA'S WITNESS PROTECTION

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NOTE: This spoiler was submitted by Sophia

The film opens at the Needleman home on a Saturday morning. George (Eugene Levy), who works at Lockwise Industries, must go in to work even though it’s the weekend. He can’t make some of the accounts he oversees balance, and he wants to check in with his boss Walter (Tom Arnold). His wife Kate (Denise Richards) reminds him that he needs to be back in time to take their son Howie to his baseball game. George arrives at his office and finds everyone running around in a panic. A CBS investigative report will soon reveal that the charity branch of Lockwise Industries has been running a Ponzi scheme for the past seven years. Walter promoted George from a lowly accountant position to the CFO of the charity branch so George could eventually take the fall for him. George has also unwittingly been laundering money for the Malone crime family. George goes home and panics; to make matters worse, he missed Howie’s baseball game, too. He receives a dead rat from the Malone family, and FBI agents arrive to arrest him and take his family into protective custody.

In the Atlanta district attorney’s office, Brian (Tyler Perry), makes a connection between Lockwise Industries and the Malone family. After further investigations, he figures out that George’s testimony could help put members of the crime syndicate behind bars. His boss doesn’t want to give George a deal, but he does want George to testify, so he expects Brian to let the Needleman family live with him for the duration of the trial.

Young Jake (Romeo) tries to rob Madea (Tyler Perry). His plan backfires, and she makes him do chores around her house. Brian comes by to ask Madea to host the Needlemans. Jake tells him that he invested his father’s money in Lockwise Industries and has now lost $114,000. The money was supposed to pay off the mortgage for his father’s church, and now Jake would rather rob people than face his dad’s disappointment. Initially Madea and her brother Joe (Tyler Perry) want nothing to do with the Needleman family; they change their minds when they learn they will make $4,000 a month hosting them.

The Needlemans arrive at Madea’s home: George, Kate, Howie, George’s senile mom Barbara (Doris Roberts), and George’s bratty daughter Cindy, from his first marriage. Madea tears into Brian for not telling her the Needlemans were white; she doesn’t think she can hide white people in her neighborhood. Brian has confidence in her ability to protect them. Cindy insults her family and complains about Madea’s home, which shocks Madea. Barbara takes a liking to Joe, and to his discomfort, hits on him. That night Kate argues with George. He has been an inattentive husband, father, and businessman, and now they’re in this mess. The next morning Madea whips the Needleman family into shape. She makes Kate cook, forces George to wake up and face reality, and disciplines the children. Barbara mistakes Madea for a maid she once employed.

Jake’s father tells him how proud he is of him, which makes it difficult for Jake to tell him about the church’s lost money. At the district attorney’s office, George tells Brian and his boss everything he knows about the Ponzi scheme. Brian’s boss doesn’t believe George’s naiveté, but Brian does. Brian tells George he’ll help him sort through Lockwise Industries’ unshredded paperwork to find the information that will exonerate George. Back at Madea’s home, Barbara keeps talking to Joe about their wonderful evening together and his boat. Joe thinks she’s crazy until he remembers his military days, when he used to drive a boat. Fifty-three years ago he slept with a nurse named Barbara. Barbara tells Joe that George is fifty-two years old, but then she descends into senility, so Joe can’t ask her what she’s talking about. Jake goes to Brian’s office and flies into a fury when he sees George. Brian stops the men from fighting, and George feels terrible when he learns about Jake’s lost money.

That night, Joe asks George a series of questions and determines that he is George’s father. When he tells George this, George blows him off. In the kitchen, Howie tries to write a report, and Cindy tells him that he’s dumb like his mom before storming upstairs. Kate goes outside to grab some fresh air, and Madea follows her. Madea can’t believe how disrespectfully Cindy treats her family. Kate reveals that Cindy’s mom dropped her off at their house two years ago and hasn’t been heard from since. Cindy blames Kate for her parents’ divorce and lashes out frequently. The next day, George and Brian go over Lockwise’s paperwork. The charities that Lockwise supposedly helped will go bankrupt unless George can figure out where the money went. Instead of helping, George complains about his predicament. When he goes to Madea’s house, Barbara asks if he spent the day with his brother. George reminds her that he doesn’t have a brother, then catches the tail end of a fight between Cindy and Kate. Kate tells George she can’t “do this” anymore. Channeling Madea, she tells George she wants him to get “damn mad” about what’s happening to them.

A montage shows the Needlemans adjusting to life with Madea. One day Madea tricks Cindy into thinking that the Malones killed her entire family. Cindy begins sobbing, because she actually loved her family very much. She’s relieved when George, Kate, and Howie come home. Later, Barbara hears gospel music coming from Jake’s father’s church, and she asks George to take her to the service. Jake tries one last time to tell his dad about the lost money, but his dad’s too excited about telling his congregation about the paid-off mortgage to listen. Jake’s father uses the word ‘precious’ in front of the congregation, which triggers something in George’s mind. Back at Madea’s house he explains to Jake and Brian that Walter always talked about a woman named Precious Jackson. He now realizes Walter created a fake woman so he could filter money from a Swiss bank account to an American account set up under her name. If George could access that account, which contains sixty million dollars, he could repay Jake and the rest of the charities. Brian knows that telling his boss about the account would cause the district attorney to freeze the assets, so he leaves. George gets the idea from the movie ‘Ghost’ to pass Madea off as Precious Jackson, so she could withdraw the money.

George, Jake, and Madea fly to New York incognito. Hilarity ensues when Madea goes through airport security, takes her first plane ride, checks in at a fancy hotel, and learns about tipping bellhops. The next day Madea goes to the bank and meets with Jack Goldberg, the man who oversees Precious Jackson’s account. George and Jake wait in a car outside of the bank, and they freak out when she seems to take too long. But eventually Madea emerges, victorious in her mission. Back in Atlanta, the charities have been repaid, and enough evidence has been gathered against Walter that the charges against George have been dropped. Madea bids farewell to the Needleman family, who attend a gospel-music-filled service at Jake’s dad’s church before leaving town.

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